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Imagine you walk into the college kitchen in the morning. A classmate looks up and says, ‘You OK?’ You stop. Do I look ill? Is something wrong with my face? You start to explain that you slept badly and you are a bit worried about your essay… and your classmate looks slightly panicked.

Don’t worry, this happens to almost every international student, and it happened to me too when I first arrived in Britain. ‘You OK?’, ‘Alright?’ and ‘You alright?’ are, in many parts of England, simply ways of saying hello. They are not real questions about your health or your feelings. The person is not expecting information. They are expecting a greeting back.

So what do you say? The answer is almost always another greeting, and it should be short:

‘Yeah, good, you?’ or ‘Not bad, you?’ or simply ‘Alright?’ back. Yes, you can answer the question with the same question. It feels very strange at first, but it is completely normal.

What you shouldn’t do is give a full, honest answer, unless the person is a close friend and you are sitting down for a proper chat. A greeting is a small ritual (= something people do the same way every time), and a long answer breaks the rhythm.

Why do British people greet each other like this? ‘How are you?’ works the same way in many languages, and ‘You OK?’ is just a shorter, more casual version of it. It sounds friendly and relaxed, and in Britain sounding relaxed is very important. A formal ‘Good morning, how are you?’ can sound a little stiff (= too formal) between classmates or colleagues.

There is one exception worth knowing. If someone asks ‘Are you OK?’ slowly, with their head tilted and a concerned face, perhaps after you have dropped your coffee, then it is a real question, and they do want to know. As always in English, the tone tells you more than the words.

You will hear many variations depending on where you live: ‘Hiya’, ‘Y’alright?’, ‘How’s it going?’ and ‘You good?’ are all greetings too. None of them needs a detailed reply.

These are exactly the kind of small, everyday rules that nobody teaches in English classes, and they make a big difference to how quickly you feel at home. I put twenty of them into a free guide, The Unwritten Rules. Download it here, or book a free 30-minute chat if you would like to talk about your English.